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All I Want for Christmas is the ability to make a fast comeback!

Why oh WHY can’t I ever think of a fast comeback?!

Santa, maybe that’s what I should be asking you for. To be quick-witted enough to come up with a killer fast comeback at the moment it’s needed, not half an hour later.

Yes, there’s a story behind my Christmas wish …

I ducked into the shops last week to grab a couple of last minute things, and went to pay at the nearest free self-service checkout.

I Must Confess

Now this is the embarassing part – I must confess that I waltzed up to the terminal and began my purchase, not realising there was in fact: A QUEUE.

I was completely oblivious, until a woman tapped me on the shoulder and narkily told me: “There is a queue you know!” (Gosh – what was up her nose!)

Turning around, I could see she was right. I was mortified and immediately began apologising and scuttled to take my place in the queue, behind Mrs Narky. She shook her head at me and continued to look narky.

Well, that did it – my blood began to boil! I repeated that it was an an honest mistake and she didn’t have to be so rude. Then I walked off (I nearly burst into tears, I was so upset).

In the car on the way home, I thought of  about a MILLION classic comebacks – of course it was a bit late then!

Fast Comeback Number 1.

I should have turned around, looked her up and down, and said, “So??????” and completed my purchase!

Fast Comeback Number 2.

“Oh, is that a queue? I thought it was just a bunch of Brown’s cows!” (Seriously, that was what it looked like once it had been pointed out to me – no wonder I’d missed it!).

Fast Comeback Number 3.

“Who died and made you the boss of everybody?”

Fast Comeback Number 4.

“Hey, don’t have a cow, man!”

Fast Comeback Number 5.

“And a happy Christmas to you too!”

I can laugh about it now, but it did take me a while to cool down.

Thinking on it now, I can’t help wondering what was behind her narkiness. Whatever happened to grace?!

Did she take an instant dislike to the look of me for some reason? Maybe I looked like her husband’s favourite ex-girlfriend! Maybe she’d been at the shops for hours and was at the end of her tether. Could it be she was stressed about how she was going to afford her purchases? Maybe she’d lost a loved one recently? I almost began feeling sorry for her!

I really do hope she has a happy Christmas. It sounds like she needs one.

Would you point out their mistake to an oblivious queue jumper? How could you say it so that it comes across as “nice” rather than “narky”?!

Linking up with Kirsty at My Home Truths for another Monday of “I Must Confess” – because it really does feel better to get this off my chest!

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