GAYDAR: a word created when you combine “gay” and “radar”. As in, do you have the innate ability to detect if a person is gay?
According to my kids, my gaydar is hopeless.
Example 1:
I was at a workplace for twelve months before somebody mentioned that one of our young male colleagues was in fact, gay. I was astonished – he actually had a very close friendship with one of our young female colleagues, and I had (mistakenly) assumed that perhaps they were an item. Apparently nothing was further from the truth – it was more a case of the girl with the gay best friend. And I’d had NO inkling, despite working with both of them for a year!
When my colleagues realised that I wasn’t very clued in, they then joked: “And I suppose you don’t know that Mr X (another older male colleague) is also gay!”. Needless to say the look on my face gave me away.
Example 2:
Just last year we attended a large function. On the way home, Mr 19 & Miss 17 agreed that one of the young guests (that we’ve met at functions like this many times over the years) was DEFINITELY gay. I wasn’t sure I agreed – but they were adamant.
Then just in the last few weeks we heard through the grapevine that this young person has indeed “come out”. My kids were right! I seriously didn’t have a clue, even when the kids insisted it was so.
Obviously my gaydar is not very well attuned ;-).
Mind you, I don’t think that’s a bad thing.
I think it shows that I accept people as they are. I care about who they are, not what their sexual orientation might happen to be. Quite frankly, as a happily married woman, that’s none of my business!
The world might be a much better place, if there were more clueless people like me!
How’s YOUR Gaydar?!
Linking up with my mate Essentially Jess for I Blog on Tuesdays!
I can never pick it and my sister is gay. Some people are definitely more tuned in aren’t they.
I just don’t even think about it when I meet people!
Very rarely can I pick it unless it’s obvious!
I thought you’d be good at it with your psychology background!
Being gay doesn’t mean you have to be camp, I think that some people want to be noticed for their preference and others want to stay quiet. I can usually pick it up if they want people to know, but then I have had friends who act gay but are completely straight. Interesting topic!
I wonder if some people are just naturally camp, or if they do it to emphasise their ‘gayness’?
My Gaydar is pretty good! Some are hard to pick though! And yes, well done for accepting people as they are!
I think that’s the main thing
Mine is pretty spot on. As a few of my friends are in gay partnerships, it seems to increase your awareness and I can usually pick them. xx N
It probably does develop with experience.
I’m with you I don’t judge and don’t assume, we are all people no matter what our preferences are. We like them or don’t nothing else matters xx
People is people – doesn’t matter if they are gay, straight, black, white or pink with purple polka dots! 😉
I thought mine was great but recently found out I was very wrong when a friend’s daughter married a BOY (and I would have put money on that she was gay).
I agree with you though, it’s refreshing that you’re seeing past someone’s sexuality to the person underneath, their character – the really important part of someone.
Who cares anyway?!? 😀
I really don’t care about whether a person is gay or not. I personally know lot’s of gay people. Two of my friends sons are gay and I have a gay cousin. It doesn’t alter my relationship with them. In fact I seem to have a lot more in common with them than some straight men I know!
I haven’t really got one, sometimes I get inklings but not really. I can pick up the blatantly camp men, but then can’t we all? x
Mine is as hopeless than yours Janet!
I asked a friend if she thought a guy liked her, and she said “Do you think it’s because of my mannish qualities?” (She had a deeper voice than most women).
Needless to say, I’m not that great either. 🙂
Im great picking guys, but some women I don’t see. Its surprising when travelling, that even a guy may not be particularly camp, they often have a similar accent all across the world 🙂 I did pick one of my friends before she recognised/realised – she was gob smacked when she came out and we all told her we had known since we met her 🙂
I also think that I would scream out straight to anyone. I would hope that wouldn’t cause people to judge me, the same way I wouldn’t judge anyone. Yes, I notice if someone if gay or not, No, I don’t give it any importance in the scheme of life.
That’s interesting to know the accent is the same the world over – LOL!
Ha! I enjoyed this. My gaydar is iffy. Sometimes, I can, sometimes, I can’t! Especially in a professional work environment. It’s better to be “clueless”!
No… no idea, and I worked in the theatre industry for a very long time.
I have a better male gaydar than a female one. Possibly because I was very much the ‘tomboy’ as a child so I don’t like to assume a masculine is anything more than that. My kids are pretty much attuned though and they are in theatre/dance and music so maybe it takes the artistic side of the brain to be throbbing, mine’s pretty dull 🙂
I think it is much more important, as you say, to just be respectful of people…regardless!
We don’t walk into a room and play “spot the single person” or ‘spot the dad”, so why be tuned in for gay people?
No I can’t tell either! And I agree, it’s not a bad thing! We’re just accepting and non-judging 🙂 x Aroha