An Open Letter to the Class of ’83 …
Well hey there!
Long time no hear; fancy you stumbling upon this page š . It’s okay, I’ve been known to Google or Facebook stalk people I used to go to school with too – so I completely understand!
This is what I used to look like in Grade 8. Is my face familiar?!
I’ve caught up with some of you at school reunions, or on Facebook. Others have disappeared off the face of the planet! Does anybody know what happened to Cathy Pratt, my best friend in Year 9?
Back in the day, you knew me as Janet Moore from Aspley High. I’ve been Janet Camilleri now for over 25 years and have the most awesome husband a gal could wish for. And, we have two great kids, a boy (Mr 21), and a girl (Miss 19).
I have my own business, making my living from writing for the web and providing search engine optimisation (SEO) services – things we had never even heard of back then! And I’m loving life š .
As a teenager, I was troubled by acne, and I was real skinny. Thanks for the nicknames (not!) – “Flatjack” in Year 8 as I was a late developer; “pigeon legs” in Years 11 and 12 for my skinny legs and knobby knees. These days my boobs have definitely arrived, and my legs are probably my favourite feature – see for yourself!
I was being raised by a single parent and we had no money, which made it really hard to fit in – thank goodness for school uniforms, because I never had the “right” clothes. How jealous I used to be of you, when you would talk about the awesome presents you got for Christmas or birthdays – bikes, stereos, roller skates – all big ticket items. These were things I could only dream of.
So how do you remember me? As a quiet, nerdy type? Perhaps if you were in my circle of friends, you knew I could be a bit of a clown. Being funny can often hide deep wounds, y’know?
What you probably didn’t realise – hell, I didn’t even realise back then – was that my mother had a severe mental illness, and I was subjected to terrible verbal, emotional and physical abuse. So those times when I was unable to participate in school events, even study groups? And you really gave me a hard time about it? There was a good reason why I couldn’t go … I just couldn’t tell you what it was … that the violent repercussions at home just weren’t worth it.
This pic was taken when we were in Year 12. Can you see the bruising and cut on my cheek? My split lip? My puffy eyelids?
Miss T, my theatre teacher in Year 12, snidely informed me that I couldn’t act. Inside I was thinking, “Lady, you have NO idea – I’m actually a BRILLIANT actor. I act every single day, and you have no f****n clue.”
I Must Confess: I was never one of the popular kids, or the “in” crowd. I wasn’t at all sporty. I hung out with the “God Squad” – the goody two shoes / church goers – remember them?
I was devastated when I wasn’t made a prefect. That was the year when prefects were selected by their peers, instead of the teachers – there were some very *interesting* choices of prefect as a result! It hurt that I was a “goody goody”, but couldn’t even win a nerdy title like “prefect”. I can’t help wondering, if the teachers had chosen that year, if I would have made the cut. In hindsight, who really gives a rats!
I felt ignored and forgotten when I didn’t even rate a mention in our Senior Gag Awards in the school magazine. Ah well. With a class as big as ours was, I’m sure there were dozens of others that felt much the same!
Chances are, you too have a story that I had no idea about when we were in school. I often think how lucky/blessed I am these days; my teenage years might have been crap, but I am making up for lost time now. I really hope life has been kind to you too since we last met.
Best wishes,
Janet Moore from Aspley High x
Linking up with My Home Truths.
Such a powerful letter Janet. I wish teenagers were more aware of how much their actions and words can hurt others and stay with them for many years afterwards. Unfortunately the “I’m invincible, it doesn’t matter to me” gene (or whatever it is) kicks in and off they go. Bet it feels good to get it off your chest despite how painful it may have been to write.
Take Care. x
It sure does Zita! Ever since I thought of this post last week I was burning to write it; so glad I actually got the chance over the weekend.
I agree with Zita. What a life you have had. You should be incredibly proud of how you’ve come out the other end.
Thanks Raych!
What a great letter to the world. I also tried to be prefect but I have no idea why. That wasn’t me at all. I think I thought I was supposed to try…
I longed to be noticed or have some recognition at school. It’s something I still struggle with today … no doubt a remnant from those difficult years.
What an amazing letter and one that many would not like to receive if they were one of the people who never understood. Sorry about such a crappy teenage experience as it could have shaped your entire adult life. I’m happy that you have a wonderful life now and always share you amazing stories
I wonder if they would even remember/recognise themselves?!
So happy that you have been so blessed after you secondary school years. What a great letter
I was burning to write this ever since I thought of it last week … love it when that happens!
I can so relate Janet, one of my nicknames was chicken legs in high school. I also had very little friends throughout highschool and was excluded a lot. Going to a private school full of rich kids when I was the kid that got a scholarship because I had a single parent who had no money kind of marked me as an outcast from the beginning. Mind you I don’t think many of them even knew I had a single mother, let alone the fact that my dad had committed suicide. Actually I’m sure most don’t as even a teacher accused me of having my mum or dad write one of my assignments because it was too good lol. Much like your internal dialogue with your teacher I was standing there thinking well he’s bloody amazing if he can come back to life just to write my assignment for me. I’m so glad highschool is over it wasn’t really that fun for me. Don’t you love how once you leave though all the cliques and status shit doesn’t matter anymore.
Wow it is amazing how much we have in common; so glad life is much better for both of us these days. I imagine being a scholarship student would have been even harder; Aspley was a reasonably affluent area back then which didn’t help. I felt very much that I came from the “wrong side of the tracks”.
Oh Janet, I’m in awe of your honesty. I totally understand where you’re coming from. I wasn’t popular or good at sport at school, and I was never a prefect either. The closest I got was being on the social committee and that was only because nobody else wanted to do the hard work of organising events. Those of us who experienced these issues in high school learned quickly to become resilient and focus on what we’re good at. I’m so pleased you’re much happier now than you were then. Yes, you are making up for lost time. Such a beautiful letter xox
We are just late bloomers Lyndall, look at us now!!!
High school is like another lifetime, isn’t it? I’m glad you had the opportunity to write this and expel some of those demons. I also felt forgotten back then – but I’ve never looked back since!
Perhaps we are just late bloomers Kirsty!
This post is heartfelt and beautiful, Janet, and you’ve shown amazing resilience to survive the childhood you’ve had, become a successful wife and mother, and raise a beautiful family. The photo of you in Year 12 really shook meāyou can see the pain in your eyes, and that you’re not smiling. How come no teacher noticed your bruises and cuts? That’s a rhetorical question because I suspect they did notice and didn’t want to see. Domestic violence at the hands of mothers is still overlookedālet’s hope that changes one day. I’m in awe of what you’ve been through and accomplished since.
That’s something I’ve often wondered myself Louise!!!! I do remember ringing Lifeline one night when I was about 14, and basically being told I was a naughty teenager and that I should try harder. Hopefully kids of abuse get better support and advice these days!
What a horrible time for you Janet. My childhood was pretty unremarkable but I was lucky as most of my problems were self-inflicted.
I was relatively popular at school. A school prefect. Did well in sports. I had a close-knit family though my brother was a very high-achieving type. Whereas I made Qld Basketball teams, he made Australian Basketball teams, and won State Athletics titles. He got a 990 TE Score and was school captain. I think I always felt like a bit of an underachiever as a result. Not sure if that’s why I became anorexic at 15-16, but if I’m honest most of my feelings about high school are tainted by the screwy headspace I was in those final years.
Like I said though, I had really supportive parents so was very lucky.
You’ve overcome so much and done such a wonderful job with your life and family. Congratulations.
That would be hard to have such a super star for a sibling! I loved basketball in high school, in Year 9 I actually made the Girls Basketball B Team. I was ecstatic. But guess what none of the other schools had enough kids to field a B Team so that was the end of that š .
I have read this post lovely Janet but you were nominated for the #JustBecause Linkup .. Congrats.
Thanks Natalie, love the idea of the #justbecause linkup!
Janet you are one resilient lady. That photo of you in grade 12 is absolutely heart breaking. Absolutely. I just want to reach through my laptop and hug you. But despite everything you have a beautiful family and you’re a bundle of bubbling delight. You’re a special woman… you know that right. xxx
It makes me feel the same Pinky. I must post the story about how that photo came to be. It’s the only one that shows some of what I went through xxx
Such a beautiful and raw letter Janet. I love how in spite of a difficult adolescent, you have bounced back tremendously and are truly living your life now surrounded by wonderful people who love you. Would you mind very much if I printed out your post and showed it to some of my teenage clients? I guess to show them there is hope. That having a difficult family doesn’t mean they are going to struggle forever? I am happy to black out your name and school.
Sanch, I am tickled pink that you think my post would give your clients some hope, and that my story could help somebody ā go for it. You donāt have to blank out my name or anything, Iām cool with it xxx