Middle Aged Mama

Blogging about my Midlife Adventures

Mum I’m a Streetwalker!

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I’m pretty sure that these are words that no mother wants to hear:

“Mum I’m a streetwalker!”

mum i'm a streetwalker

And yet – that is exactly what I told my mother, many years ago …

How I Became a Streetwalker

The year was 1980.

I was 13 years old, and had successfully auditioned for the chorus of our high school musical, Guys and Dolls.

But I was hungry for the limelight. I didn’t want to be an anonymous face in the crowd, so when I heard that they needed two chorus members to play streetwalkers in the opening scene, I put my hand up.

To be honest, I don’t think I had any real clue as to what a streetwalker actually was. Nor the other euphemism which was bandied about: “ladies of the night”.

It all sounded incredibly glamourous to me. All I knew was that I was terribly excited about my costume: a sexy red dress, with fishnet stockings and shiny black high heels!

Can you imagine what my poor mother must have thought, when I excitedly announced that I was to play the part of a streetwalker in the school play?!

Me in White Horse Inn
The year before, I was in the school production of “White Horse Inn” as stall holder at the market.

Strutting My Stuff on Stage

I was on stage for all of two minutes.

My friend and I had to walk arm in arm across the stage, stopping midway to chat to one of the “Guys”. She dropped her handkerchief, and while the guy bent over to retrieve it, I lifted his pocket watch from his back trouser pocket, before dangling it high in front of the audience.

Naturally it got a good laugh and I relished my moment in the limelight.

Now though? It’s a bit of a giggle really, and maybe a bit cringe worthy – I was so naive!

What’s the most shocking thing you ever said to your mum – intentionally or otherwise?!

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  1. I remember reading some joke in a kids (I assume, but kind of wrong!) magazine or similar and going out into the living room and going “What does lost my virginity mean”? haha. Poor shock to their system. That was NOT something ever discussed that I can remember!

  2. I have rather blunt conversations with my mum nowadays. I think it comes with age. I told her recently I thought perhaps I’d be happy if I met someone just to have a physical relationship with (I was more blunt than that) rather than move in together etc…. (I’ve lived alone for 20+yrs so not sure I could live with anyone now).

    • It sounds like you and your mum are close, so though she may be a bit taken aback at first, I don’t think you would shock her too much!

  3. So where is the photographic evidence of your sashay into streetwalking? That lovely little photo of you in a sensible dress and flat shoes just doesn’t cut the mustard in comparison to fishnets and high heels! Maybe you need to do a re-enactment for your blogging audience 😀

    • Funnily enough mum didn’t take any photos of me in that outfit!!!! I wonder why?!

  4. The only time I shocked her was when I told her my marriage of 23 years was over as I just could not go on living with a physcotic alcoholic anymore….and they had no idea as I am not one to overshare. xx N

    • Wow, that would have been a shock. When my sis and her hubby split, we knew there were issues, but no idea how bad things were.

  5. Ha ha! You probably gave your Mum a heart attack! I think I shocked my Mum when I phoned her up to tell her I had rolled my car into a creek and walked out of the accident with barely a scratch at the age of 22 years. It’s a long story how it happened, but I’m extremely lucky to be alive today. #TeamLovinLife

    • At this stage only Mr 23 has his licence, but yes, that would be a shock your poor mum x

  6. Ahh what a lovely story! It’s a feel good for sure. And we all know there’s no way we could have been hoodwinked to believe that you could ever have been a street walker of the street walking kind.

  7. You were braver than me! I was so shy at school and had no desire to be on stage and have attention on me. Strange that I produced a daughter who thrived on drama and dance at school and was very good at it too and become drama captain! I was a difficult teen for my poor parents. I was the eldest and they were so strict compared to my friends parents so I rebelled a bit! Mum and I had lots of disagreements over the length of my skirt when I went out. I liked them short. She didn’t! haha #TeamLovinLife

    • Woohoo! Were skirts that short when we were young nippers Min?! Imagine if you’d been born 5 or so years earlier, then your mum might have had something to complain about!

  8. I was difficult as a teen – not because I rebelled, but because I argued with her mostly over viewpoints and ideas. Mum & Dad are quite conservative politically speaking & I had (even back then) quite left wing & very green in terms of my politics. Mum used to say she hoped I had a daughter who would grow up & do the same to me. I used to tell her that I hoped for that too – because it meant that she would be well read & well informed. That didn’t come to pass – my girl is very much in the it will be alright in the long run camp. #TeamLovinLife

    • LOL there is no doubt that our children follow their own unique paths!

  9. Hmm…possibly when I told her that I was pregnant at 19. I chose to tell her as she was dishing up a roast dinner for 10 people. She almost forgot to make the gravy….

    Poor Mum.

  11. Gosh Janet, you – a streetwalker? Never! You got me in too 🙂 I can’t recall having shocked my Mum either. I possibly did at some stage, but my Mum always played it pretty cool, so she wouldn’t have let on. #TeamLovinLife

  13. Janet do you remember that conversation in our French class when someone… Tamara? asked what consummate was… but she meant Consomme? …And we got a very long and delicately phrased answer?

    • Haha yes will never forget that one! Wonder what happened to Madame Hartley?!

    • Oh I thought the girl at my school that played Miss Adelaide was just amazing! Slight girl crush here!