Traditionally, men in their forties are the ones that fall victim, but I think it’s fair to say that these days women may also find themselves showing signs of a midlife crisis.
According to psychologist Matthew Ryan, midlife can be a time of disillusionment – when the dreams and fantasies of youth are often revealed to be exactly that.
In midlife, we realise that they are never going to happen (boo hoo, I’m never going to be a fashion designer or a super model!) – or perhaps they have happened, but didn’t turn out to be quite as great as we expected.
We begin to ask ourselves the tough questions, like:
- What have I achieved in my life?
- What is the point of it all?
- What next?
- Where to from here?
My Midlife Crisis
Although I’ve been in the right age range for several years now, I think what catapulted me into a midlife crisis of sorts was when my job was made redundant a couple of years ago. I was 45.
I’d spent years in that workplace, and until that point had fully expected to stay there until I retired. Although I wasn’t wildly enthusiastic, I was happy with the status quo. I’d invested a lot of my life there. And suddenly, all that I’d felt I’d achieved, all that I’d taken pride in, seemed meaningless.
What was the point (apart from bringing home a pay packet)?
What next, and where to from here?
A Midlife Crisis can lead to Drastic Changes
In my case, it was kind of forced on me. But at the same time I asked myself the hard questions, and realised that it was time to do things differently.
I realised that I had at least another 20 years in the workforce, so I wanted to do something I enjoyed. Something that I found meaningful, as well as being a way to pay the bills.
So I started my own business. I cannot BEGIN to tell you how different it is to work for yourself after working for a large organisation! Lots of positives; but lots of drawbacks too. What a huge learning curve!
Other people make different changes.
I’ve heard recently of one woman who left her husband, bought a motorbike and got a new guy.
Another – like me – found a whole new career.
Others decide that it is finally time to make travel a priority, while they are still young and fit enough to enjoy it! (I think I need to add this one to my list!)
The Man in My Life
So what about the man in my life – the hubster. Has he had a midlife crisis?
I always thought he had his midlife crisis a bit early. In 2001 – when he was 33 – at his instigation, we packed up all our worldly goods, bought a caravan, and travelled around Australia with our two kids. I figured that would be it. Midlife crisis done and dusted. Whew. Glad he got that out of his system.
But now he’s 45 (yes, I’m a cradle-snatcher).
And currently on long service leave, which is giving him a chance to ask himself a lot of deep questions.
Buckle up folks, this could be a bumpy ride …
What about you? Any signs of a midlife crisis (yet)?!
