As parents, we want to do our best for our children – but with the wisdom of hindsight, are there things that we will one day regret?
With both my children now grown (and one flown from the nest), I have been doing a lot of thinking and reflecting.
Quite apart from looking for new goals, I’ve also been looking back at the things I would have done differently if I knew THEN, what I know now …
Perhaps you can learn from my mistakes, so I’ve listed my parenting regrets:
1. Private School
Although our children started out at a private school, for various reasons we took them out before they had completed primary school. It seemed the right decision at the time, but …
Neither of our children went on to university (UPDATED 14.04.16: As Mr 21 just pointed out to me, I need to update this! He is now studying for a degree in Commerce and has taken to it like a duck to water!). We can’t help wondering that if we’d somehow managed to send them to a private school for their high school years, if that would have made a difference – to their study habits, their peer groups, their careers? Both claim it wouldn’t have … but we have our doubts. And maybe not just a private school, but an all girls’ or all boys’ school, so there wasn’t the distraction of the opposite sex!
2. A Swimming Pool
We always wanted to have a pool for the whole family to enjoy, and so that the kids could become confident swimmers.
When we were looking for a new home six years ago, we really wanted to get a house with a pool. We just felt it would be such a great thing for teenaged kids, to be able to have their friends over and hang out around the pool. Sadly, we couldn’t find anything suitable at the time and so the pool never eventuated … and now it’s too late 🙁 .
3. No Sony Playstation
We gave Mr 20 a Sony PS1 for his 5th birthday. How I wish now we’d held off from all the electronic games and gizmos for as long as possible, to allow our children more time to just play and experience real life! Ditto to introducing them to Facebook – what WAS I thinking?!
4. Gone Camping
Not my favourite thing, but it would have been a great way to have together time.
5. Changing Churches
When our kids were about 12 and 10, we changed churches. While I have nothing against changing churches, I can’t help feeling the timing was all wrong for our family. We took our children away from the church environment and friends they’d known all their lives … and they never really got into it again. Neither of them attends church now.
At each stage of our parenting journey though, we did the best we could. And as the hubster pointed out, we didn’t exactly have the best parenting role model (in my case) nor did we have grandparents close by to guide us.
Do you have any parenting regrets?