When it comes to social media, Facebook and Instagram are probably my faves – though I have to admit I sometimes struggle with the pressure to present a “perfect” Instagram feed, carefully curated and colour coordinated.
It just looks so pretty y’know? But then I think, pffftttt, who can be bothered, and also – isn’t part of my mission here at Middle Aged Mama to keep it real?!
So yes, FB and Insta are where I hang out. I’ve even updated my Twitter profile to let people know it’s probably not worth their while to follow me there:
The Downside of Instagram
But lately, things have changed – and I have taken the drastic step of setting my Instagram account to private.
Why? Because I am fed up with random perverts males following me and looking at my photos. Maybe it sounds like an exaggeration, but I almost feel violated by their attentions (oh, and did I mention that many of them comment or send private messages wanting to connect / chat / hook up / marry / who knows what?!).
For every genuine follower, my Instagram seems to attract two dozen of these weirdos: usually either American, military, or Arab men.
The thing is, I’m a happily married woman. I don’t *want* to connect with other males. And I don’t want them to follow me.
I was feeling quite uncomfortable about it, which was only exacerbated when hubby happened to see a list of my followers on my phone. I’ve gotta tell ya, it doesn’t look good when your hubby sees what looks like every man in the world is perving on following you! Naturally he wasn’t impressed and I don’t blame him. Where is the respect?!
I’m also struggling to understand why on earth all these men want to follow my account. Why am I so hot right now?! Clearly, I’ve still got it (whatever IT is)! After all I mostly post pics of cats, clothes and scenery from my morning walks. Hardly the sort of stuff guys are interested in … or so I thought.
I tried to discourage them by writing in my profile that I would “block” any random male followers, but it didn’t seem to help. So I set my Instagram to private.
Hashtag #getlost
Turns out, it could be due to the hashtags I’ve been using. I asked a social media consultant for her advice – and her theory is that my beloved fashion and style hashtags are attracting the wrong type of followers. How sad!
So I’m going to cease and desist, and in the meantime, I’ve set my account to private to try to stop the flood of male attention, and to give me a chance to prune my followers and delete a whole heap of hashtags.
It could take a while though – my Insta has been set to private for a couple of weeks now, and I’m still getting plenty of male follow requests … sigh.
And that in a nutshell, is why I hate Instagram lately.
If you have any other ideas or solutions, I’m all ears!
I am with you on this. I have also recently change my Insta account. It’s creepy and a violation. My posts are boring either food, books, interesting things/places. I avoid putting photos of my family on Insta. Keep on sharing about your fashion and cats. Keeping it real is how I like it. Have a good one!
Thank you Charmaine, I’m glad you like it 😉
I only joined Instagram a few months ago, mainly to see pics of family members who don’t post much on Facebook. I very quickly set my account to private after finding that lots of men were following me who I didn’t know. So I can understand your decision Janet. It’s much better to have control over who follows you I think.q
My only concern is that as a blogger, some of the brands I work with might not like that I’ve set it to private. Just have to wait and see!
I don’t use instagram at all. I’m not a fan of the concept. 🙂
Oh poor you! That’s so annoying – IG is my favourite platform. Now I’m intrigued… What were the hashtags?! Hope you get to post in peace very soon!
Hi Sammie! Janet and I were chatting about this and I mentioned she might be best using “location based” hashtags to help avoid bots and/or Nigerian Prince’s looking for a beautiful wife. Adding a location before the hashtag (e.g. #BrisbaneFashion) makes it more local and more likely that people actually wanting to look at your stuff see it.
The downside is you may get less likes/follows/reach overall however the engagement you do get is generally more authentic. x
I’ve only recently in the last 6 months or so started sharing photos to Instagram, only because other bloggers said I should But I really don’t there regularly and I really don’t know what it is all about or why I should. Sorry to hear that you are having problems with unwanted attention and hope you are able to sort around it. Have a great weekend and thank you for stopping by my blog this week.
Hi Janet, I just culled all my Instagram followers for this reason. Now I block anyone who follows me who I’m not comfortable following me. I’ve also removed most of my personal photos and made my account more of a “my favourite things” kind of account. I’m feeling much happier on Insta now. I hope you do soon too.
I’m over Instagram for other reasons. I do occasionally get a random man following me, but not as often as you Janet. I generally block. Lately I haven’t been feeling the need to share as often on Instagram. I’ve even stopped doing stories, occasionally sharing the odd thing here and there.